Anxiety isn't just emotion, it's interpretation: what we learnt from Riley in Amusing Minds 2

Anyone who has seen the new film Funny Mind 2 you may have left the cinema with a strange feeling, a mixture of identification, discomfort and even longing for yourself. That's because Riley, now a teenager, isn't just feeling new emotions. She's trying to understand what all this says about her.

And that's the main point: feeling anxious, ashamed, bored or envious is part of life. But the way we interpret these emotions can define how much they hurt us.

This is the focus of Emotional Schema Theory, developed by American psychologist Robert Leahy. It proposes that we all have a kind of "personal theory" about what it means to feel. This theory is built up throughout life (by culture, family, experiences) and determines how we react to what we feel.

Riley felt anxious, but the problem was what she believed about it

In the film, Riley begins to experience new and intense emotions. Anxiety, for example, comes on strong when she is called up for a hockey try-out. But more than anxious, Riley seems confused, ashamed and insecure. And this has less to do with the emotion itself, and more to do with the ideas she begins to form about having anxiety.

She thinks that if she's anxious, then something is wrong. That if she feels afraid, she'll fail. That if she's nervous, she'll be rejected.

According to Leahy, these beliefs form what we call emotional schemas. And the problem with them is that they are often distorted, rigid and silent. We don't realise that we're believing these ideas, we just feel that everything is "wrong" inside us.

Emotions aren't the problem... the problem is how you've learnt to judge them

How many times have you thought something like:

• "If I'm feeling this way, it's because I'm weak"
• "I can't let others realise what I'm feeling"
• "If I don't control my emotions, everything will go wrong"

These beliefs may seem like absolute truths, but they are interpretations. More importantly, they are learnt. Leahy explains that people who see emotions as threatening or shameful tend to develop coping strategies that only make the situation worse, such as ruminating, avoiding, isolating or criticising themselves.

Riley shows this symbolically in the film. By trying to "shut up" her emotions or hide what she's feeling, she loses her inner balance. And isn't that how it is with us too?

What if you started to question what believes about what you feel?

One of the possible therapeutic paths proposed by this theory is the following: instead of trying to control or eliminate what you feel, how about investigating what you think about these emotions?

Instead of asking yourself "how do I stop feeling this way?", perhaps the most useful thing to do is to ask:

• "What have I learnt about feeling that?"
• "Is it really dangerous to be anxious?"
• "Why do I put so much pressure on myself to always look good?"

These questions don't solve everything overnight. But they do open up space for a deeper kind of change: a new relationship with your own emotions. A relationship that is less demanding, less judgemental and more human.

Difficult emotions aren't faults, they're part of life

The film shows that growing up is often confusing. And that feeling too much can seem like a problem. But what Funny Mind 2 also teaches us is that emotions need space to exist and that it all starts with the way we choose to look at them.

If you live with anxiety, perhaps what hurts most is not the emotion itself, but the weight of internal demands. The fear of appearing vulnerable. The pressure to always look good.

You don't need to control what you feel. You need to understand what you believe about what you feel.

And this can be worked on. The therapeutic process is a safe space to rebuild these beliefs, learn to validate emotions and develop more functional ways of relating to your inner experience.

References:

Leahy, R. L. (2018). Introduction: Emotional Schemas and Emotional Schema Therapy. International Journal of Cognitive Therapy, 12(1), 1-4. https://doi.org/10.1007/s41811-018-0038-5

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